Homosexuals Excited to be Just as Miserable as Heterosexuals.

Couple o’ sad gays.

With the announcement from President Barack Obama that he believes same-sex marriages should have all of the benefits of heterosexual marriages, homosexuals want the world to know just how happy they are to be just as miserable as everyone else.

For years, homosexuals have walked around with perfect posture, a little pep in their step, and an adjective dedicated to them: glee.  With President Obama’s recent announcements, the homosexual community has been markedly less postured.  It seems that most of the homosexual community did not truly understand how horrible and wretched a marriage can be.  “We know gay marriage isn’t even legalized yet,” stated soon-to-be-newlyweds Mark and Brian (last name to be decided at a later date).  “But we’ve sure been acting like it.  And boy does it suck.  Not literally.”

Apparently the two had already been living together in a monogamous relationship for several years living out the typical duties of a love filled and caring married couple.  Of course, without the certificate.  “We did not think it would be that big of a change just by having the certificate.  Now that it is pretty much in our hands I just hate it.  It’s the worst.”  This story is very typical of many homosexual couples after hearing the word from President Barack Obama he felt gay couples were entitled to all of the same rights as straight couples.

No word yet from Mark and Brian as to whether or not their soon-to-be marriage will last.  And we will probably never know as other news is bound to come up and push gay marriage into the background once again.


About Rawful News
I write satire and gossip. Check it out at Or Tweet me @Kendoggydog28

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