Castro Asks Pope For Forgiveness: “Sorry about not joining capitalism sooner”

Couple of cuties!

This past week, the Pope of the Catholic Church (in case you were unsure which church) visited the nation of Cuba which he has not seen in some time now.

He traveled all across the nation in order to bring the word of God and to see exactly what the nation’s religious prospects have been up to.  But Fidel Castro only had one thing in mind that he wished to discuss with the Pope.  He wanted to ask for forgiveness for not joining capitalism sooner.

“Forgive me Father for I have sinned in not giving in to capitalism,” Castro began.  “We’ve been starting to sell stuff outside of Cuba and it is so ridiculously awesome to make some money for something you yourself made.  Well not us.  The Chinese.  But you get it,” stated Castro to the Pope.

The Pope then replied that it was fine, just as long as he got his shit together for the coming years.  “Because if you die without Cuba completely giving in to capitalism, you will go to hell.  No exceptions,” stated the Pope.  Castro, being a devout religious man, has agreed that hell sounds pretty terrible and heaven sounds pretty sweet.  Expect Cuba to slowly move to a capitalist system in the coming years.  Of course, don’t expect relations to open up between the United States and Cuba because everyone still remembers what they did to us.  Right?


About Rawful News
I write satire and gossip. Check it out at Or Tweet me @Kendoggydog28

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